May 4, 2005
the emmitt school of illness
categories ::Bear is SuperSick(tm) right now. Awful headaches and vomiting and other evil. I don't know what it is, and we don't have health insurance, and we're going to a doctor today.
When I'm sick, I bitch and moan. A lot. I get really needy. I want everyone to take care of me. I describe my symptoms in piteous detail until probably nobody wants to be around me. I think people don't love me if they don't fawn over me and shower me with goodies and amusements. I am very unlike, say, my cat Emmitt. Emmitt is a tough kitty. He'll play and frolic and do his crazyinsane cat dance until I trip over him in the middle of the night and turn on the lights to find him having a seizure. He'd had a severe ear infection for months and (being an already clumsy sort of cat) never let on a single sign.
Bear is part of the Emmitt school of illness. He's been having sinus headaches that he's brushed off as allergies. We've gone on with our social lives and partied on in the normal way, until he came home yesterday and fell into bed. "How bad is it, on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst pain EVER?" I asked. I was thinking between four and six.
"Eight," said Bear.
"Aieeeee!" I said. Or something like.
"Well, I haven't had a very painful life," Bear said. At which point I fall over, astonished.
Okay, fine, Mr. Man. But since you never complain ever, I'm onto you. I will be watching you. Oh yes. Like a HAWK. Prepare to get conscientiously cared for! Your non-complaining ass is mine. HA. No longer shall your suffering go unnoticed! PREPARE!!
I'm trying not to worry. It's cool, it's cool. I'm trying to think of things to do, because as long as I'm sitting next to him he says he's happy. WTF? Don't you want me to fan you with palm fronds or something? Slather your feet with cocoa butter? Ply you with movies and reading from "The Phantom Tollbooth"? Puree all your food into digestible and un-aesthetic servings? Re-tell the Greek epics in sock puppet burlesque? Or something? I'd really like to do something.
Oh God, I'm such a ridiculous person.
Posted at 10:44 AM
Oh, you're not ridiculous. You're cute, and you're a wonderfully caring wife. I hope Sean feels better soon.
Posted by: Q at May 4, 2005 2:13 PMI know _I'd_ like to see the Greek epics in sock puppet burlesque. Maybe you should videotape that.
Poor Bear. He is a Stoic manly-man underneath the cartoon exterior. I hope he makes like a trampoline and bounces.. uh.. back!
Posted by: Jotan at May 4, 2005 2:50 PMPersonally, I fall into your camp of being sick. Sancho's more like Bear though and it's frustrating to not be able to do anything when he's sick especially since he does stuff for me 'cause I demand it when I'm sick.
Anyhoo, boys are silly. Hope Bear feels better soon.
Posted by: Kathy at May 4, 2005 3:18 PMBBBOOOIIINNNGGG!!!
That's the sound of me slowly bouncing... back.
So it turns out that the sinus headaches I was passing off as allergies for days were... <trumpet fanfare> allergies. Just worse than I've had them before. No infection. The doctor prescribed Duratuss and Flonase (and took back the Flonase prescription and gave me a sample bottle instead when he saw we're still uninsured). After the first dose and some rest, I'm significantly better.
All I need now is some SockPuppetBurlesqueGreekEpics. Ooh, do we still have that cocoa butter Magenta left here? :)
Thanks, everybody!
Posted by: Bear at May 4, 2005 6:24 PMi love bear
like
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